Sunday, July 19, 2009

"We can't bury Shelly - S-She's a friend of ours. "

Evil Dead (1981)

Who doesn't love cabins in the middle of nowhere, being raped by trees and dismembered by a skeleton sword? I know I do!

This one is about 5 young adults, Scotty, Ash, Linda, Shelly and Cheryl, who decide to take a vacation at a cabin in the middle of nowhere. The bridge they cross over on the way all but collapses while they are crossing it. Once they settle down in the cabin they hear something in the basement and obviously have to check it out. The cellar contains the book of the dead, a tape recorder with some kind of demonic recitation and a sword that has a skull figure at the handle. The playing of this recorder wakes some demon-spirits up. Cheryl hears a noise and decides to venture into the woods where she is raped by a tree, when she gets loose she runs back to the cabin. Ash (her brother) decides he will drive her to town to stay somehwere else but alas, the bridge has completely collapsed by now. Cheryl completely freaks out back at the cabin becoming possessed which leads to her being locked in the cellar.

"Soon all of you will be like me... And then who will lock you up in a cellar? "

Soon after Shelly is possessed, she attacks Scotty. First, she is thrown into the fire, Scotty for unknown reasons drags her out and she is after him again. Finally, Scotty grabs an axe that Ash was holding and completely dismembers her and buries her. Next, is Linda who is resting in another room after being stabbed with a pencil by Cheryl. Ash goes into check on her and she of course is possessed. Scotty leaves to find another way back to town but soon after returns beat the fuck up by trees. Linda attacks Ash and he kills her, in a roundabout way and buries her as well, she returns and Ash decapitates her with his shovel. Ash returns to the house to find Scotty's body missing and Cheryl out of the cellar. Of course, he is attacked by both, eventually the book of the dead finds its way to fire and the two begin to morph into nasty bloody puddles of oozing goodness. When Ash walks out of the cabin it is morning, he heads for the car only to have 'something' coming up from behind.

Best line in the movie, one that I'll remember forever: "We can't bury Shelly - S-She's a friend of ours. " Ash's reasoning is rock-solid. And the time I didn't spend laughing at this movie was spent gagging. For example, probably one of the best scenes of gore in all of horror-dom is the eye-gouge scene complete with milky pus-blood followed immediately by a mountain spring of watery blood coming from Scotty's leg.

I have to admit Evil Dead is an amazing wickedly awesome movie! The setting is perfect, the acting is great and Sam Raimi is awesome for writing this shit!! Ash is played by Bruce Campbell who has had some remotely mentionable roles in movies such as Spider-man and The Majestic.

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